In a couple of weeks, I have the opportunity to participate in the 2nd Annual Stress & Anxiety Symposium presented by the Parent Engagement Network (PEN). They do an amazing job supporting parents and students. My break out session is entitled “How to Use Your Values to Manage Your Time”. Twenty-five percent of high school students are affected by anxiety at some point during high school. The number goes up to 40% in college. The good news is that anxiety is highly treatable.
In the New Year, we set new goals for our lives. In my last blog about boundaries, I discuss why boundaries are the key to making New Year’s resolutions work. Another important part is knowing your needs and values. needs are our personal priorities and principles make functioning sustainable. Until your needs are handled, life isn’t going to “work” for you. Values tend to be personal qualities or passions. Values are what you stand for – Who you are. It can be difficult to express your values until you learn to meet your needs because you’ll be interrupted by your needs wanting to be fulfilled. Goals and decisions that are based on your values tend to be more satisfying to accomplish. Often our new goals fail though not because our needs are not being met and are goal don’t align with our values. My needs are faith, family, and education. I meet these needs by going to church, learning more about my faith, praying, supporting my family members, spending time with my family, and learning more about subjects that interest me. My values are compassion, service, order, and appreciation of the arts. One of my business goals this year is to serve those who can’t afford ADHD coaching by finding funding to our high school students the opportunity to participate in group coaching at no cost. Did you catch the compassion, service, and order in that goal? I am always learning about art as a docent at an art museum.
It seems like when new goals are not achieved, some people assume the cause has something to do with a personal character flaw or lack of self-discipline but that’s not what it is. It is the connection between satisfying our needs so we can express our values through our goals. It does take some habit-forming for some and some self-evaluation. If you want goals to success you need to have time for them on your schedule. I often have clients fill out self-evaluation forms for a few reasons:
- To see how they are spending their time and if what they are doing moves their goals forward.
- To evaluation self-care issues like sleeping are in place or not and the effect those self-care issues have on how they are feeling.
- To evaluate patterns of overestimation and underestimation of how long tasks take them.
If you aren’t scheduling time to work on new goals or your priorities in life, they aren’t going to happen by just thinking about them.
But how does this relate to anxiety? Often people with anxiety have trouble focusing or knowing what the next step is due to being overwhelmed. Here’s to how put in to your time management:
- What are manageable pieces of your goal to you? Break it down to what you can do.
- What order do those pieces need to be done in? Make a list.
- Where and when are you going to do those steps? Find an environment that feel good to work in and a time that doesn’t feel pressured.
- Need support? What does that look like for you.
- Schedule it. Actually put that step in your calendar.
- Find accountability. Tell someone your plan and ask them to check on you.
- It is important to schedule downtime as well.
Just accomplishing one manageable piece at a time which allows you to start managing your time and to move forward on your goals.