Every January, people set review goals from the previous year and set new goals.
Wait! What? No, they don’t. Most New Year’s Resolutions fail before January is over. There is nothing magical about January 1; we can choose to evaluate how our goals are going at any point during the year, and we should. The problem with New Year’s resolutions is that people chose vague, complicated, unmotivating, and unmeasurable goals. These are often goals that they feel like they should do but don’t want to do. For example, do any of these sound familiar lose weight, get in shape, start being on time, get my sh.. together?
For many people, the start of a new year is like a clean slate. For others, it is the start of a new school year. These dates are arbitrary, but since New Year’s is around the corner, we are going to go with it, but feel free to start working on your goals or new habits anytime before that January 1 as well.
Here are some tips for helping with those goals to be successful.
You may need an attitude shift –
Stop trying to “fix’ yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Everyone has challenges, and everyone has strengths. Your challenges may be taking you more effort to figure out than others, but that is okay.
Figure out why –
I am not saying you should have health goals as goals, but they need to be specific. For example, if you are a parent who can’t keep up with your kid, then getting in shape or losing weight may be a goal for you. And you have a more motivating why.
Set a deadline. Maybe it a year-long goal, but perhaps it is a six-month goal. I think it also necessary to have sub-goals that serve as reminders. You can do these by sending yourself a text with an app (I use Send it later), put them in your calendar, or write yourself an email from www.futureme.org.
All this being said, maybe health goals aren’t relevant to you. That is fine. You may be more focused on social goals, career goals, school goals, family goals. All goals can be broken down into smaller goals.
KISS it –
Keep it simple. We’ll just drop that other S since we aren’t trying to be negative here. If the goal has too many steps or seems too overwhelming, you aren’t going to do it. People with ADHD tend to overestimate two things. 1. How long tasks take 2. How much effort it is going to take. So know this information with help with motivation. Time how long the new habit or action will take or put a time limit on it to start. A great way to form a new habit is to tie it to a successful current practice. Begin with what is easy to take on. You may have a yearlong goal for health, but this month’s goal is to go for three walks at lunch, and it some buying candy.
Accountability is key –
Self-motivation is not a strength for most people with ADHD. So you are going to need some accountability.
You can achieve this in different ways. One way would be to find someone else to help you go to the gym, study for a test, clean the house, complete work responsibilities on time. These could be pre-arranged ongoing appointments with a friend, colleague, or paid service. Often you are providing the same accountability to them.
It could also be someone who is a mentor or accountability partner. You could also choose to use an app like StickK, GoFuckingDoIt, or BeeMinder. These apps all work similarly but read the details before signing up. In a nutshell, you set goals, make a commitment (usually financial sometimes to a charity or anti-charity), and report your progress. Some require you to have a third party verify your statements.
Hire an ADHD coach or Executive Functions coach –
Sometimes you need more than an app, a friend or a family member can give you. A coach can help you become aware, move into actions, and accomplish goals across different areas of your life.
Again you can get started any time; it doesn’t have to be January 1. Today could be the beginning of a new habit or goal!
